Just one of thoes days...

I believe that everything happens for a reason.

We're not just tossed by the wind,

or left in the hands of fate.

But sometimes life sends a storm that's unexpected.

And we're forced to face our deepest pain.

When I feel the heartache begin to pull me under...

I dig my heels in deep, and I fight to keep my ground.

Still, at times the hurt inside me grows stronger,

and there's nothing I can do but let it out...just let me cry.

When I agreed that God could put this heart inside me,

I understood that there would be a chance that it would break.

But I know He knows exactly how I'm feeling...

and I know in time He'll take the pain away.

But for now...just let me cry.

I have felt joy, the kind that makes my heart want to sing.

And so my tears are not a surrender,

I'll feel that way again.

But for now...just let me cry.

I know it's hard to see,

but the pain I feel isn't going away today. Just let me cry.

Till every tear has fallen, don't ask when...and don't ask why.

Just let me cry.

-Hilary Weeks

Be still, my soul

I have a blessed life, I love my life. Heavenly father has given me so much to be thankful for. We have the greatest family, who would do anything for us. We have wonderful friends, who are always there for us. And I have Ryan, my most sweet husband...who I would be lost without. He is always, ALWAYS there for me...he listens to me, he wipes away all my tears, and he loves me unconditionally. And I am thankful for the knowledge I have...that my Family is Forever.

Our sweet, most precious little boy was born Jan. 29, 2011, at 25 months old. Even though he was still, I know he is mine....and I will see him again. I can't wait for the day when I can hold him again, and kiss his sweet little head. We named him Jason Kay Arnold, after Ryan's big brother. We were able to have a funeral service for him, we laid him to rest by his uncle Jason, and by his grandma and grandpa, where we can visit him often. It's hard to express everything I feel, my emotions are very unbalanced. With everything I am, I know I will be with my son again. I know that with my whole heart and will never doubt it. But, even that...doesn't stop the pain. My heart is broken, it hurts and I feel the ache everyday. I keep telling myself time will heal everything, but I honestly don't think we'll ever be normal again. There will always be a hole in our hearts till we see our son again. We know we will be together again....forever and ever. And until then, he is with the lord, and he is happy. That is what gets us through each day. That brings us peace.

There is so many amazing people out there, that are so loving and giving. Ryan's work, all went in and got us this most perfect picture, by Simon Dewey. It reminds us everyday where our precious little one is. A photographer volunteered to come to the hospital, in the middle of the night...to take pictures of our sweet Jason and we're able to get pictures of a few sweet moments with our baby. There is a support group of other mommas this has happened to, that also came to the hospital, in the middle of the night, just to let us know we are loved. They made a special keepsake box for us to take home. And Meyer's Mortuary also came with their love, they provided all their services to us for free. We received many gifts, beautiful flowers, facebook comments, and cards full of kind words, love, and support. We are truly thankful for so many people, we have felt their love and prayers in our behalf. It helps us get through this trial, to know so many people care and love us. We can never express how deeply we have been touched by your love.

"Be still, my soul; the hour is hastening on

When we shall be forever with the Lord,

When disappointment, grief, and fear are gone,

Sorrow forgot, Love's purest joys restored.

Be still, my soul; when change and tears are past,

All safe and blessed we shall meet at last."

There is no end to Glory,

There is no end to Love,

There is no end to Being,

There is no death Above.